Goodbye Raisa

Raisa's grave under a shady part of my flower garden.











15 June 2010, we bade goodbye to Raisa. She has been Izrin's girl for almost 20 years and Izrin was devoted to her. Even at the last moment he still insisted the vet to order through internet her RM100 medication for her kidney failure.
2 days before her death, I found Raisa wondering on the road in front of my house and was almost hit by a car. At her last few days she has turned deaf and blind and was skin and bone. Ika rushed down to carry her back to the house. We suspected she was looking for a lonely spot to die. From then on, we decided to put her at at our back section of the house with Mok and closed the door so that she couldn't wonder around anymore. On Wednesday, when I checked her she was lying down under a table. Izrin forced feed her no matter how late it was when he came back from work.
By the evening, I found her dead. Ika called Izrin who immediately rushed back and was so distraught. With Haidi, he buried her at my flower bed - my former fish pond. Today I bought 2 African daisy plants to plant at her grave. Izrin visited her grave before and after work.
Thank you Raisa for the wonderful time you gave us as a family. We will always remember you for your independence and intelligence.
Now I am so worried over Mok who is suffering the same kidney problem and has lost weight. His hair is not as lustious as before and he eats very little. I don't know how I will take it if he suffers like Raisa. This is so heartbreaking. Mok, please get well. Love you sooooo much.

Blog Block

It's quite a while since I logged in my blog. There were so many things to write and share but I didn't seem to have the mood to punch in the computer. It's 4.30 am now, I can't sleep. Jen came knocking on my door late at night, looking for Raisa who was hiding under my table in my room. Raisa is in critical stage of her sickness and most time hides herself in dark places. The vet said this is not a good sign. I know Jen will be devastated if Raisa dies.
I came back from PD today after spending time at my apartment for 4 days. I missed Rania tremendously and so looked forward to be in PJ again. I suffer from Grandma fever syndrome and I don't think I can heal from it. At 8 weeks old, Nia's look has changed and she looks a bit more Malay now. Looking after Nia full time exhausts Ika who finds herself tied down to the house and to the baby. I can understand how she feels and try to help by taking care of Rania at night once in a while so that she can have undisturbed sleep and regain her strength. I think Ika is slowly accepting motherhood though she complains that I never told her how hard being a mother is. She doesn't know it yet, there is more to motherhood than just having a baby - baby grows-up!
The last visit to my eye doctor was quite positive. My eye pressure was comfortably down and surgery was put on hold. I hope the third eye drop will prove helpful in keeping the pressure down. I am not too keen on surgery and the risk is 50-50. I am crossing my finger for the best.
Thank you UIA dor the PRS Seminar, my apology to Wan of UiTM Segamat for declining the invitation to conduct workshop and thank you to G of KUIS for the invitation as a panel discussion, thank you also for Sheila Menon for wanting to keep me as an examiner for Hypnosis course. At this moment, I am on 'semi-retirement' from professional activities and will get back to it when my emotional tie with Rania eases a little bit.